Silence is Golden.  

Leon preferred that complete absence of sound.  Nearly his whole life had been committed to that.  He was the guy who kept himself apart from the general population.  The silent observer.  Even among his few friends he had been some what removed.

Irvine had made it his life mission to open him up after they met.  Zell and Selphie had warned him it was a futile effort.  Squall Leonheart was simply not social.  That wasn’t to say he wasn’t friendly, just distant.

Rinoa was the one who had managed to break through that wall he had built so well around him.  She cracked open the shell encasing his heart showed him it was okay to feel and even better to love.  Because of her, he began to truly live.

And then she was taken away.

As suddenly as she entered his life, she left it along with everyone else he had come to care for, to love.  The thing he had always feared most came true and he was alone again.  It hurt.  It hurt terribly and he knew somehow it was his own fault.

He had failed them somehow.  How had he survived the Heartless when the others, the ones with the truly strong hearts, hadn’t?  Why was he alive when his friends weren’t? Maybe he had been selfish.  Maybe at some terrible moment, as they fought for their lives he had thought only for himself.

He didn’t remember the day the Heartless came very well.  There were gaps in his memory that no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t fill in.  Maybe that was because he didn’t really want to remember.  Maybe that’s when he-

Leon growled to himself and swept the Gunblade in a wide arch.  The target sliced easily in half.  He had to stop this.  Going over the past like this, getting lost in questions he knew never would be answered wasn’t going to change anything.

If he kept getting lost in the past like this, he’d become like Cloud.

He smiled tightly to himself as he set his weapon on the ground and began the process of resetting his targets.  Cloud was such an enigma.  In the beginning, he had thought the two of them to be nothing alike.  Sure they were both quiet, both a bit distant, tended to brood more than they really should but their reasons for it came from different sources.

Or so he had believed.

The more time he spent around the blonde man, the more of himself he saw in him.  Cloud was haunted by his past. So was Leon.  However, unlike him who had chosen to erase the past, who went so far as to change his name in an effort to detach himself from those memories of another life Cloud wrapped himself inside it.

Cloud refused to let go of anything that had happened to him.  It was his way of owning up to his mistakes perhaps.  Leon couldn’t tell.  One thing he had pieced together from the bits he knew was that Cloud hadn’t been responsible for the tragedies of his life.  

But since the slightly older blonde was still submerged in his self-induced guilt he couldn’t see that.

It had been a rather unremarkable day, rather usual actually, when he had come across Cloud in his usual position leaning against the wall of the marketplace.  Aerith had been with him, trying to explain something that apparently Cloud didn’t want to hear.

She eventually gave up and walked heavily away.  She passed Leon slowly, giving him a weak smile.

“What’s wrong?”

She pursed her lips a little and glanced over her shoulder.   Cloud was walking off.  “I was hoping he wouldn’t get like this.”

Leon raised an eye.

“Today is the day I was killed.” She said softly.  “Sometimes, I don’t think he really understands that I’m alive and truly here.  It’s like he’s still talking to my ghost.”

He watched Cloud disappear around a corner.  Not sure why, he glanced at Aerith.  “I’ll take care of it.”

Without waiting for her consent or acknowledgement, he went after the blonde man.  He let his feet carry him, hands in pockets as if on a simple midday stroll through town.  He wasn’t surprised to end up at the river.  He’d noticed Cloud had taken a liking to it.

“Why are you following me?” That low slightly raspy voice demanded.

“Aerith’s worried.”

“I told her not to.”

“And you expect her to listen.” Leon snorted.  “She worries a lot about you.”

Cloud remained silent.

He stepped over to stand beside the smaller man.  He really didn’t know why he was doing this.  “You know she’s real, don’t you?”

Cloud turned on him.  “What kind of question is that?”

He shrugged.  “Sometimes you look at her like you’re just waiting for her to disappear.  Like if you get to close, she’ll been taken away again.”

He looked away, muttering bitterly.  “What do you know about it?”

“A lot more than you think.” Leon snapped.  “Be grateful for what you have, Cloud.  They aren’t going anywhere.”

“We can’t know that.”

“So instead of appreciating what you have right here and now, you’ll wrap yourself in the past so you can wallow on what has happened as opposed to what could happen.”  Leon snorted.  “That’s a good way of losing everyone who loves you.”

“And what about you?” Cloud snarled.  “You’re so busy trying to forget, you’ve forgotten your still here.  As if changing your name changed who you are.  You’re the same person just like I am.”

They were silent for several minutes.  The running water and a few animal noises were all they heard.  A peculiar understanding passed between them.  With it came an odd tension neither was sure they wanted to understand.

Since that day, they had spent most of their time together.  They never spoke of the conversation but each was aware of little differences in their attitudes.  Cloud became more involved with the restoration, talked a bit more with Aerith, Cid and Yuffie.  Leon grew more relaxed about things, felt more comfortable with his new companions, his friends for that’s what they were now.

But there was one thing they both refused to do and that was opening their hearts.

They ended up living together in a small house near Zero district figuring they wouldn’t drive each other too crazy.  Both being rather solitary people, they kept to themselves but were often content to be in the same room.   Though neither would say it they got to the point were they felt something was off if the other wasn’t around.

When Cloud disappeared for three days, Leon found himself growing fidgety.  He had no idea where Cloud had so abruptly left for and less of an idea why.  He hadn’t realized just how much of a constant presence the other had become.  The house was empty without him and Leon nearly drove himself crazy trying to find things to occupy his mind.

Anything that stopped the worrying.

Cloud had been gone for long periods before.  This wasn’t an unusual occurrence.  Only, Leon had never been so obnoxiously aware of them before.  

Cloud reappeared almost as suddenly as he had left.  He walked through the front door very late at night and glanced over at Leon who was staring at him from the chair where he had been reading.  There was an endless moment as if both had made up their minds about something but they didn’t know what.

“Sorry.” Cloud mumbled.

“Don’t be.”

“I just needed to clear my head a bit.”

“It’s all right.”

Cloud had slowly approached him.  His eyes were incredibly bright.  Leon stood up.  Cloud took one step closer.  “I don’t want to do this.”

Leon wasn’t sure what this was.  Only he somehow understood that he didn’t want it either.  The words that left his lips were said without conscious thought.  “But I need to do it.”

It was like they had the same thought, Cloud beginning it and Leon finishing it.

Suddenly Cloud’s hands were gripping his face and his arms were wrapped around that slim waist, tugging him closer.  The blonde’s hands twisted in his long chestnut locks and his face was brought forcibly down so that lips could met and begin an intense battle for dominance.  Tongues were introduced as weapons and Leon tightened his fingers on the other man.

He shoved Cloud’s shirt up roughly, tracing the sides of his lightly muscled abs and chest.  The kissing broke so that the fabric could be removed, followed by Leon’s own.  Cloud’s fingers fanned across tanned chest and Leon dove in to attack his neck.

They were not gentle in their actions, driven by a barely acknowledged need.  Neither was too sure why this was happening but refused to stop it.  They simply wanted to live in the moment.

Leon pushed Cloud back roughly onto the sofa.  The fair one grunted as teeth attacked his chest.  He began frantically working on the fastening to those damn leather pants that were now very much in the way.  Cloud in turn dealt with his own restricting clothes.

Free from the burden of clothing, hands, mouths and teeth explored every bit of skin they could, not wanted anything left untouched.  Outside of a few groans they were silent until with only a whisper of warning, Leon drive into Cloud.

Then the moaning began, increasing as Cloud was steadily brought higher and higher.  Leon bit his lip but couldn’t contain his own soft noises.  They had both become so lost in feeling they couldn’t imagine way they had been denying themselves of it for so long.

They somehow managed to tumble over the edge of pure bliss together.  Leon collapsed upon Cloud, gasping for breath.  They didn’t hold each other nor take the time to try to discuss this.  Deep down, they already know how they had gotten here.

Both had been so busy trying to not live in the past, they had still forgotten to see what was happening now.